A Modern AU, but with Pirates
by Havendance
Summary: Chrom's happy to run his bar, The Sleepy Shepherd. But then he gets kidnaped by sky pirates and things just get crazier from there. (A fic war between me and my brother. Expect craziness, slightly unedited fic, and things that make no sense.)
1. Chapter 1

**AN: This is the first installment in an epic battle between two authors. We will try to yank the genre back and forth between us so things will get interesting. Here goes: (oh and** havendance **is up next.)**

 **AN #2(Havendance): So, this is written by everywhichwaymb who doesn't have an account. It was posted here with his permission. How this works is we take turns writing chapters so he'll write the odd chapters and I'll write the even ones. I hope you enjoy! (Unless otherwise noted, on odd-numbered chapters, the author notes will be everywhichwaymb's.)**

* * *

As Chrom was walking back from the grocery, he noticed a gang sign in the alleyway near his bar, the Sleepy Shepherd.

"Blast it." he thought. "It's those stupid Risen again, that weird voodoo gang. They're trying to take over the area near my bar. I'll have to call the police to check it out."

When he entered the bar, Lissa ran up to greet him.

"Chrom, you're back! Thank goodness. it was hard keeping up with all the customers when there was no barkeeper. Anyways, there's someone here wanting a job. She's back in your office if you want to check it out."

"Okay, okay, Lissa," Chrom said with a laugh. I'll check them out." He went to the back of the bar where he put the groceries down. "Hey Stahl, can you put these away? I have a job interview to do," he shouted to the back of the store.

"Okay, be there in a minute," Stahl yelled back.

"Alright then," Chrom said. "Now, where's that person who wanted a job?" he thought to himself.

"I'm right here." a voice came out of seemingly nowhere.

"Huh?" Chrom said, looking around. "where are you?"

"Down here," said the voice again, coming from a woman in her thirties. "Sorry, I just had had a really bad headache, and I had to lay down a moment. Wait-" she said, looking around,- "where am I?"

You're in the Sleepy Shepherd," Chrom said. "You came here looking for a job, right? "

"I guess so… yeah. I'm good now. So, what jobs are you hiring for?"

"Well," Chrom said, "we need a financial advisor. do you think you could do th-"

He was interrupted when an explosion went off across the street. he raced to the window, saw it was the raider gang, and quickly ducked down behind the bar, grabbing his custom-made pistol.

"Get down everyone!" He shouted, Hitting the lock button for the electric doors.

"Chrom, wait," Lissa cried, grabbing the first aid kit. "There are people out there that might be hurt!"

"I can help." the stranger said, getting out some strange gadget, probably a taser. "I think I used to be in a police force or something."

Chrom blinked. "O-kaay. Let's do this." And the employees ran into the gang battle, in what would be known as the "Shepherds' Charge" in barrooms for years to come.

(They would also talk about Donnel, the really overpowered merc with a solar-powered machine gun.)

* * *

 **AN: Ignore that last part, that was just for fun.**


	2. Chapter 2

Robin smiled to herself as she fingered her trusty revolver that she'd pulled out of the hidden pocket in her cloak. The shepherds didn't suspect a thing, trusting completely that she was on their side. Chrom had even swallowed her excuse about having a headache; the real reason was that she was listening to the vibrations in the ground that would signal that her men were getting out of the place in time. Looking out over the battlefield, she decided that they'd made quite a fine distraction; stirring up the local gangs was always easy. Now, all she needed to do was get Chrom alone.

"Robin! Get your head in the game!" Chrom shouted from beside her. He blocked an attack from one of the gang members with a steel pipe that he quickly dropped, pulling back out a gun of his own.

"Sorry," she quickly put the revolver back in its sheath. She wouldn't be needing it for this fight. "Zoned out there for a minute." Instead, she pulled her cutlass from its scabbard, the dull one that was purely for show, it could still cause some pretty nasty bruises. "Do attacks like this happen much around here?"

Chrom shook his head, aiming and firing at one of the gang members. "Short answer is kind of." He pulled Robin around a corner as a bullet flew past them. "Ask again later."

Robin quickly scanned the area. She wasn't that far off from where she'd parked her glider. She could probably lure him over and grab him while everyone else was distracted by the heat of battle.

"Come on," she said, pointing to where she'd hidden it. "We can hide in that alley over there. It should get us some good cover."

Chrom looked over to where she was pointing. He nodded. "Good eye. Let's go."

They made a run a for it. Robin hit a few people with her cutlass on the way there. They yelped when she did. That made Robin smile a little to herself. It was good to see that her skills were as good as always.

Robin's glider was waiting in the back the alley where she'd left it. She started to uncover it and get it ready to fly. Chrom wasn't paying any attention to what she was doing. Instead, he was looking around the corner at the commotion that was going on in the streets, occasionally firing off a shots. He was also muttering to himself. Robin didn't really pay much attention to that, she had more important things to do.

There. Her glider was officially ready. Robin looked at it with pride, now, all she needed to do was to get Chrom to the ship with it.

At that very moment, Chrom turned her way. "Good eye, Robin. This is a great spot." Then his eyes fell upon her glider in the background. "What is that?"

"It's my ride," Robin said. A look of confusion crossed Chrom's face before she shot him with a tranquilizer dart and he crumbled to the ground.

Mission accomplished. Robin radioed her crew. "I've got him," she said. "I should be right up."

"Roger that," Tharga said, her voice crackling through the radio. "I'll tell Lon'qu to open up the bay doors for you."

It didn't take that much effort for Robin to transport Chrom up to the ship. The hard part was not being seen. Well, she had paid off enough of the officials to guarantee most of them would look the other way. Being an sky pirate meant that you had certain standards to uphold after all.

* * *

Chrom woke up with a pounding headache. He shouldn't have drunk that much beer before bed, no matter how much Vaike had been egging him on. Then he realized that he wasn't actually in his bed, he was lying on a hard wooden floor with clouds drifting overhead. What in the world was going on?

He started to get up and look around when his head began to throb like crazy and he groaned. He was on a ship of some sort. At least, he assumed it was a ship, it looked like the wooden boats that were in the pirate movies that Lissa insisted on watching every once in awhile.

His head would not stop throbbing, damn this headache. He leaned against the side of the ship, looking over the edge. If he was on a ship, it wasn't a ship in the traditional sense. From what he could see, it looked like they were flying way too high above the ground for his tastes. He quickly ducked back, sitting on ground that was at least theoretically solid before he thought too much about what was really keeping them in the air.

"I see you're awake." A voice came from behind him. It sounded vaguely familiar, but he couldn't quite place where he'd heard it before. He turned around to see a white-haired woman strolling towards him with the air about her of owning the place.

She looked familiar, but her name still escaped him. Most of his mind was still escaping him. "Errr, yes?" Chrom had no idea how he was supposed to reply. He was pretty sure her name had something to do with a bird. Lark? Sparrow?

"Welcome aboard my ship, _The Fell Dragon_ ," she gestured around, her cloak fluttering in the wind as she did so, giving her an especially piratical air. He was pretty sure she was a pirate, or at least up to no good. The sheathed sword at her side did nothing to lessen that. She paused as if waiting for him to react.

The name was not familiar. But then again, not a lot of things were. It did sound ominous though. "Oh," he said since he was clearly expected to respond.

"Haven't you heard of us?" She looked a little miffed.

"Uh, no."

"The fearsome sky pirates of _The Fell Dragon_? The cunning Captain Robin? Any of our treacherous and infamous deads?"

"No." Robin. That was her name. It was coming back to him now. She'd shown up asking for a job and had kidnaped him.

Robin crossed her arms and glared off into space. "We need better public relations people," she muttered under her breath before apparently remembering that Chrom was still there. "Well, get up," she ordered. "You need to meet the rest of the crew."

Chrom pulled himself up, trying to ignore his pounding headache, and followed Robin down onto the main deck. A ragtag group of people was gathered there, most of them looking like they'd spent quite a bit of time on the wrong side of the law and had stuff they'd much rather be doing about now. Chrom didn't blame them. He could think of quite a few things he'd rather be doing himself. None of them involved being on this ship.

Robin started to rattle off names and titles in quick succession. "Tharga's our communication expert and psy-ops person." She pointed to an evil looking woman who glared a Chrom and grunted. He took an involuntary step backwards.

"Burninator's our munitions/weapons expert."

"My name's Nah," a short girl said, crossing her arms.. Chrom got the impression that she was trying to look older than she actually was.

"Like I said, Burninator," Robin continued. "That's Lon'qu, he's pretty good with a blade or a wrench. He's the one who keeps us flying."

A dark-haired man nodded tersly.

"Gaius is the best thief I've ever met. He's worth his weight in sugar."

Sugar? Chrom was pretty sure that that was not how the saying went.

"Hey, Blue." He waved from over where he was lounging against the mast.

"That's Gregor. We picked him up somewhere and he never really left. You don't want to come up against him in the fight."

A well muscled man and intimidating man waved at him.

"Olivia's the best spy we've got. There's more to her than meets the eye."

"H-hi," she blushed and hid behind Lon'qu.

"Henry's not around right now, but he's… quite the character when you do meet him.. And that's Owain." She took a deep breath in and exhaled. "Yeah, that's all."

"That's all the introduction you're going to give me?" A blond teenager, presumably Owain, yelled. "I have the great blood of ancient heroes running through my veins. Even now my sword hand is trembling for blood!"

Was he okay? That didn't' seem normal. But everyone else was ignoring him, so Chrom decided to just follow their lead.

"Anyway," Robin said, plowing on, "you are now our hostage."

"What?" Had he missed something?

"I kidnapped you. Did you think I did that for fun?"

"Uh, no?" Actually, he'd hoped that she'd been playing some sort of elaborate prank on him, but unfortunately, it looked like he was very wrong on that front. But why would she want to kidnap him? He was just a humble barkeeper. Mostly.

Robin sighed. She thought he was an idiot, Chrom could see it all over her face. "We need the key to unlock the treasures hidden in the Floating Islands of Kazmareth. The Exalt family is said to hold the key. That's why we need you."

"I have no idea what this key is." Which wasn't entirely the truth. He'd heard about the key of course and the legends surrounding the Floating Islands of Kazmareth but other than that, he really didn't know about any details.

Robin cursed under her breath. "Well we're not letting you go until we get that treasure, so you'd better figure it out soon." She stormed away.

"Captain!" one of the crew shouted. Chrom wasn't sure which one she was. "A ship's gaining on us! They're about to intercept us!"

"Damn it!" Robin grabbed a from one of the many pockets in her cloak. She stared through it for a few seconds before putting it down, glaring at another airship on the horizon. "Battlestations, crew!"

All around them, people began to rush all about, doing all sorts of thing that were a mystery to Chrom. He backed up and began looking for an out of the way corner.

Then, Robin turned and glared at him. "You're going below decks while we take care of this." And then she dragged him down below and shut the door, leaving Chrom in the dark.

* * *

 _Meanwhile, aboard the newly dubbed_ Falchion.

"Oooh, I think I see the ship!" Lissa jumped up and down, leaning over the edge and pointing at a blotch in the distance.

"Calm down, Miss Lissa," Frederick pulled her back away from the edge. "We don't want you falling overboard."

"You're no fun, Freddy." Lissa pouted before perking back up again. She ran over to where Vaike was surveying the ship's weapons. "Do you think we'll be able to beat them?"

Vaike scratched his head. "I don't rightly know. I've never seen guns like these before, but don't worry your pretty little head, Teach'll figure it out."

"Great!"

"Where'd you get this ship from anyway?"

"Oh, it was in some cave on Grandpa's property. I think he used to be some big name or something in the whole airship business." Lissa shrugged. "Well, it's a good thing we have it, right? This way we can rescue Chrom!"

"I guess," Vaike said. "I still haven't seen anything like it before, though."

"Shepherds!" Sully's voice echoed out over the deck. "Prepare for battle! According to Frederick, we'll be reaching engagement range soon! Let's show those bastards who's the best!"

The rest of the shepherds gave up a cheer at that and started trying to help out despite the fact that most of them still didn't know what they were doing.

Everything was going swimmingly until a shot rang out and the deck of the _Falchion_ shook, tossing Lissa on the ground. Smoke started to drift up, obscuring most of the deck from view.

Lissa picked herself up off the ground and looked over to see a much larger ship approaching them. This was going to be harder than she'd thought.

* * *

 **AN: So this is my chapter of the fic war that my brother and I are doing. Expect craziness. And don't ask me what's going on because I have no idea. I'll figure it out.**


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